missives

inspiration from her
dear roommates:

please don't judge me for being so lazy today. yes, i'm still in my pajamas and it's 3:30. yes, i've spent all morning eating and reading and sitting on the internet. yes, i do feel slightly guilty about it. but just know that if you leave the apartment for two hours and you come back to see me sitting on the couch in the exact same position i was in when you left, i promise, i (most likely) have moved. just a little.

unrepentantly yours,
lindsey

dear rebecca black:

please stop singing in my head. i mean i know i'm i'm i'm so excited that it's friday tomorrow, but could you make your next music video just a little less bad? because then every internet site i frequent won't be full to the brim of quotes from and links to your song, and i won't be constantly reminded of its tune.

partyin'ly yours,
lindsey

dear shower curtains:

i would be eternally appreciative if you somehow magicked your way out of the dryer and hung yourselves up on the hooks, so i could actually go take a shower and stop feeling greasy and unkempt. besides, my appearance and probable stench is not doing wonders to help convince my roommates that i'm not a repulsive, motivationless slob.

gratefully yours,
lindsey

dear short story:

i'm becoming surprisingly frustrated with you, even though i'm really liking your characters. but could you please try to be a little less complicated? it just makes me not want to work on you more, which means i get more distracted and when i come back to you you just loom up even larger and more intimidatingly not done. besides, you're kind of turning my brain to mush. all i ask, then, is that you somehow pull yourself together in my mind so i can just vomit you onto this nice, mostly-blank word document in the next few weeks and turn you in and get a stellar grade and maybe a pulitzer prize. that's really all i ask.

apologetically demandingly yours,
lindsey

dear tumblr, facebook, blogger, and the return of the king:

please, stop being so distracting. thank you.

slavishly yours,
lindsey

dear rainstorm:

thank you very very much for stopping by last night. it was really a pleasure to see you again, and especially to have you stay for so long -- i've really missed our time spent together. feel free to come by again, any time you'd like. just be sure and bring all those puddles with you like you did this time -- they were simply too much fun.

my-shoes-are-still-damp-ingly yours,
lindsey

i'm looking through you -- the beatles

small planes -- the innocence mission

norwegian wood -- the beatles